FYI

That’s How It’s Done

Nick Steele 1 Comment

With new technology comes new parenting challenges. Parents over the last couple years have been getting pretty creative with their punishments. Like the dad that shot his daughters laptop after she talked some smack about him on her Facebook. Now this lady discovered a picture of her 12yr old holding a bottle of vodka on her Twitter. So as punishment she made her hold up this sign and tweet it. It says “Since I want to post photos of me holding liquor, I am obviously not ready for social media and will be taking a hiatus until I learn what I should and should not post. Bye-bye.” The daughter said she was so embarrassed that she “begged” her mom for a spanking instead. If you look closely she’s crying in the picture (Bwahahahaha!)

1 point = Mom

*ATTENTION* Single Men!

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No, I’m not saying I’m single and that you have any kind of shot. I know, you’re disappointed but this delicious scoop of vanilla is on someone else’s ice cream cone. Plus, I like chicks so there’s that. What I WAS saying was that although you are single you can have the “girlfriend” experience with this new website GirlfriendHire.com where women post ads for the girlfriend-like tasks they will do for you. No not THAT you little perv, this isn’t a porn site! They WILL critique your clothing choices, send you flirtatious text messages, post on your wall to make another woman jealous, whatever. Every task will cost $5 just like the website Fiverr. So if you wanna “pretend” you have a lady friend OR just don’t wanna do your laundry (i’m sure that’s in there) then you should check it out!

And Yes, we all think you are a sad and lonely man…like the guy in the photo, but do what you gotta do boo boo.

5 Things You’re Doing Wrong On Facebook!

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I’m sure you’re doing a lot more than 5 things but these are just going to cover the basics. Keep that freaky weird stuff you do to yourself! Oh and we know you love your kid and the joys of being a parent but PLEASE stop showing me photos of everything he/she does everyday. I didn’t have the little brat so I shouldn’t have to watch him grow up in front of me. Luckily there is a setting for that and these 5 things that the website LifeHacker.com came up with cover it. Check them out after the jump!
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Would You Like More Money?

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Of course you would! Unless you’re my cat who just thinks its fun to knock the quarters off my desk and lose them right around the time I need them to do laundry…little bastard. Since your probably human and live in the world that I do then you most likely would like a raise at your job. Well since asking for one would be the best place to start I’ll leave that part out. Here are some tips that Men’s Health came up with to guide you to making more money at work. Read them after the jump!

It’s About Time!

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They have finally accepted the new generation! By “they” I mean the the National Broadcasting Alert System. All the major US carriers will go live with an emergency alert system on your cell phones. You will get text warnings for tornados, flash floods, earthquakes and more. You CAN opt out of these alerts however, you won’t be able to avoid a presidential declaration of a national emergency. The carriers are: At&t, Cellcom, Cricket, Sprint Nextel, T-Mobile, US Cellular, and Verizon Wireless. I think this is way over due with the vast amount of cell phone customers there are now. Will it work? We will see when the first alert hits!

5 Signs You Suck In Bed!

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We all think that we are Gods in the sack (I don’t think, I know) but not all of us can be so lucky (Seriously though, I’m great) If you don’t have an honest partner in your life then you may need someone to wake you up from your dream (why don’t you believe me? Honestly, best 2 minutes of your life) If you can say yes to at least half of the 5 signs then you may need to take a closer look at yourself as a person. Well at least a sexual person. Who knows! As long as your significant other is happy or happy to lie to you then what do you care right? Well check them out anyway after the jump!

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iPhone 5 May Have Bigger Screen!

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There all always tons of rumors floating aroung about the next generation iPhone. I have found that for the last 3 concepts they have said the screen was going to be bigger but it never happens. So I’m not sure how much you can trust this one but it came with some cool concept photos. If this is what it looks like then put me down for 2 please! According to the Wallstreet Journal Apple has ordered screens from it’s Asian suppliers measuring “at least 4 inches diagonally” and according to the pictures they are expecting a new body style as well. Check out more phots after the jump!
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Manscaping!

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It’s the cool thing to do! What is it you ask? Well it’s just like it sounds, landscaping a mans body. I am a believer in the scaping (what the cool kids call it…probably.) only because I am extremely low maintenance. The only thing I have to worry about is my “special” area. Since I don’t have back or chest hair and can’t grow facial hair to save my life, I’m pretty much a grown up 12yr old. Which is what the ladies like, so yay for me! If you aren’t so lucky then you may want to take a look at the tips that ladies have approved after the jump!
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Wow. Your Life Really DOES Suck.

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I speak of course to those of you whom are considered “Emo” by choice or because daddy didn’t play catch with you in your suburban front yard because the Porshe was in the way. We can usually spot the “Emo” kid by the way one side of his hair hangs over his eye because it makes him look “mysterious.” Well MORE bad news for you little Tommy, because you may actually be ruinging your life with that hair cut your rocking. I hope you get over that Emo stage quickly because it may have a lasting affect on you in your adult life. Click the jump to find out….or don’t….whatever….sigh…

#300

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Holy Crap. I some how made it to 300 posts. What the hell could I have possibly said about 300 different topics. I’m sure you didn’t read them all but I’ll pretend you have been stalking my page since I typed my first word. I don’t know what else to say, this really isn’t an accomplishment…it’s not gonna make the resume or anything. Ok it actually might. Right under *Excellent self pleasure-er since 1990* in the “Special Skills” section that I don’t have. Well if you actually take the time to read this post then THANKS! ….both of you. (Hi Mom!) and hopefully I can continue writing for the next 300 posts. I don’t know though, this kind of makes me a big deal and I may just hire someone to dictate what I say. Yeah…that sounds like a great idea! (FYI the picture is totally what I look like when I play pretend in my Superman costume…close enough)